They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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