yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
