I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
smell my finger.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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