Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
