so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Green mimosas i think yes
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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