All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
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