Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
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