I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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