Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
