so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Randomize
