so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Randomize
