my shit smells like andre
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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