singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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