Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
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