Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
