Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Randomize
