i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Randomize