we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Randomize
