well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Randomize
