It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
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