He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
