If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
