Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
