oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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