I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
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