I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
