Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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