Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Randomize
