Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
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