I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
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