I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
I'm at about main and main street
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Randomize
