can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize
