She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
