I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
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