So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Randomize
