either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize