they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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