It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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