Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Randomize
