I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Randomize
