Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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