I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize
