So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
found the other keg... it's in the tree
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
