I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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