It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I'm gonna fight the coyote
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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