i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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