What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Randomize
