i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
