she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
where are you?
Hypothermia
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
