so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
