I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Success! We fucked roommates!
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
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